I walked into Stephanie’s flow class tonight by the skin of my teeth (and I was a warrior through all the warrior series tonight). Not only do I have an emotional mess equivalent to projectile diaper changing, I discovered another one of my scholarly snafus I regret.
I set my intention to finalize earlier emotional spring cleaning I started a couple of weeks ago… by the end of the class I was determined to be DONE.
Setting an intention, for anything begun, not just a yoga practice, but any undertaking, makes all the difference, doesn’t it? I walked out of that class feeling much more calm and satisfied than I did this time yesterday, or this time Saturday, or Friday….
As I drive out of the parking area onto 32nd St from Lincoln, I was Moonstruck. That moon completely illuminated Camelback Mountain and I could even see the Sitting Monk! It was beautiful. Just another little gift that I got to see tonight because… because I was open to seeing something beautiful.
Back to scholarly snafus….
Yesterday was the final day of my Educational Philosophy course and I had two bears of papers that had to be written. Do you know… how positively terrifying it is… to realize, three and a half hours before your final assignment is due, that your “mini” paper (2100 words – mini) you researched, started, outlined, and structured completely wrong?!
I had a very creative (and clever) interpretation to the assignment, but it was all wrong! Whereas I expected an A in this course (A-, but still), I will be grateful if I actually pass it now, which I need an 80% awarded to me to pass. Both of my graduate degrees combined did not challenge me as much as this does.
And then, when looking for my 6th edition manual for APA for an employee to view tomorrow, I found a little notepad containing this quote I wrote down some time ago. I only know the last name of the orator, “Bethel, 1990”:
“When you make a sacrifice you receive a commodity that can never be purchased. It cannot be bargained for or demanded. It can’t be inherited or given. It can only be earned. It comes from service to others and sacrifice of self. It is the profound personal satisfaction of knowing that you have made a difference in someone’s life. The calm, quiet feeling in your heart and your soul is where humility is born. And with humility comes the real long lasting ability to lead others.”
When you make a sacrifice you receive a commodity that can never be purchased.
Okay, I sincerely promise, if I get that “B” or better in the class I will push through another one. This is not going to be the last in my list of scholarly snafus. If I don’t get that B, I will implode. How fortunate that I looked in that particular drawer, where I don’t stash my writing and dissertation guides for my 6th edition APA manual.
Was it what my little soul doctor wanted me to find? Remembering the sacrifices and the reward?